Skip to content

We’re on a feet-finding mission!

Well, that was a hoot. Four days and four nights in hospital to mend another stress fracture in my left femoral neck (I had a stress fracture in the right femoral neck mended last year). Ah spring, when a young blogger’s fancy turns to being on crutches and bumping into things a lot.There are pros and cons to hospital. Some observations:

  • Morphine on tap. Press a button, get a buzz. Although you have to be tethered to a machine all the time and that gets tiresome. What I really want is morphine on tap while I’m at the top of a mountain watching the sun go down. A warm evening with the promise of a cool night, a few shooting stars, the shy rustle of an echidna in the bushes and morphine on tap.
  • Bedpans! With one leg completely out of action for eighteen hours and an big ol’ bag of fluids running down the IV, you don’t have to be a genius to realise a third party and their buckets are going to be involved in sorting the fluid problem.. The nurses were fantastic, very cool about it, and complimented me on my technique and retention (“You must have the bladder of a nineteen-year-old boy!” is not something I ever thought I would hear, but it felt remarkably flattering at the time). I will leave it up to the reader to decide if bedpans are a feature or a bug of hospital visits.
  • Food: I know it’s an obvious thing to comment on, but I want to stand up for hospital food. The food in hospital is much better than the food on aeroplanes and better than most mall food courts. They do the best they can. Between budget considerations and the delicate stomachs of the stressed and miserable, there’s not a lot of room for culinary adventure, and they offer multiple vegetarian options at each meal, which is more than I can say for most cafés around here. Having said that, M brought me lunch and dinner every day, and, more importantly, ate it with me (although once he ate my hospital-issued mac-n-cheese instead), and we made sure I had a sackful of non-refrigerated snacks handy.
  • X-rays: they let me bring my x-rays home on a CD, which is pretty sweet (why can’t they dropbox that shit?) and I’ve been emailing them to everyone I know. I have metal in both hips! That’s so cool! I can’t stop looking at them. I uploaded them to my phone, too, so I can bug strangers with them.
  • Knitting in hospital is soothing, encouraging, rewarding, reassuring, and something to stare at intently so you can pretend you can’t hear your roommate sharing intimate details with their visiting doctors. Ditto for ipods.

Nice to be home. Kinda sucks to have crutches and a big hole in the side of my leg, but that’s only temporary.

Full story on a new Addison’s page: Addison’s disease—dem bones

 

Post a Comment

Your email is never published nor shared. Required fields are marked *