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Indecision, self-doubt, satisfaction: all this from one hat.

I finished my Slouchy Sockhead hat and we’re very happy, thank you. But when I first finished, there was a hovering ‘ehhhh’ about the whole thing. A little post-completion malaise, if you will. I’ve had it before and I’m never sure what to do with it. Finishing a knitted project is like…let me think. It’s not like taking the cake out the oven, it’s more like the critical moment where the cake has cooled and you’re cutting the first slice in front of hungry friends: there’s no hiding any more. Also the friends are really judgemental and will talk about you behind your back if the cake isn’t totally awesome. And there are hungry wolves. Also if the cake is no good, your eyelashes will fall out. And also your shoelaces are untied. (Made you look.)

If you’ve spent the whole project cramming doubts into the “it’ll block out” or “nobody will notice” cupboards, then finishing is the moment the hinges give way on the cupboard doors. Time you looked those doubts in the eye and said “you’re right, it’s time to frog”, or, hopefully “screw you, doubts, this baby has character”. Either way, it carries a vague semblance to a Moment of Truth, and which can make it weightier than it needs to be. I cast off Slouchy Sockhead hat while I was on the phone and therefore didn’t have the time or mental resources to embark on some heavy self-quest to examine whether or not I was truly, fundamentally satisfied in my innermost core with my project. But I did have a ball of yarn and some rapidly-cooling needles, so…

Forcing the issue.

I cast on a wee sockie. I’m not even sure I have enough yarn for a full pair of socks: it may have to be some sort of stripey hybrid or contrast-toe-and-heel affair — but planning be damned; the whole point is that I don’t want to go blundering weepily down the path of self-doubt, and, in using up the rest of the yarn and occupying the needles, I sealed off that path and charged confidently forward down the path of…(help, my metaphor ran out). I did not get the hat I thought I was making, but I got an awesome hat all the same.

Meanwhile, as I was typing the above paragraph, I realised: stripey hybrid — whoa, that’s an awesome idea! I have some of the same yarn in other colours and stripes may totally be an awesome development! Maybe I could try the Grumperina spiral stripes method…yeah…sock senses tingling…knitter away!

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