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Worrywart

I’m a bit of a worrywart.  Apart from the wart bit: I’m fairly sure I don’t qualify for that.  But I do worry a bit.  I consider it an extension of an overactive imagination, which I’m also prone to, since the things I worry about tend to be ludicrously unrealistic, unlikely and improbable.  I dither over decisions and worry about whether or not I’ll regret doing them (or whether I’ll regret not doing them) when I’m old and memories are all I have to comfort my cold bones.  I also worry about being old and having cold bones.

One of the few things I can’t seriously worry about is my knitting.  Sure, I can worry that I’ll run out of yarn, or that I’ll screw up the sizing and have to start over, or that the sleeves will be too short, or that I’ll accidentally felt it — but none of those things are really epoch-making.  At worst, I’ll have to chuck the project out and buy new yarn and make another one.  Boo hoo.

At the same time, I can produce things that cheer people’s hearts.  The mitts and beret I made my grandmother for Christmas were happily received, and, I believe, will be loved and used this winter (although there’s a chance they might be wrapped in tissue paper and put in a drawer ‘for good’, like when she goes ice skating with the Queen or something).  The socks and felted slippers I’ve made for presents in the past (the distant, pre-blog past) are warmly appreciated and worn to death, while the owner raves over their comfort.  It cheers me up no end to know that my skills, my fingers and my time are all it takes to make the people I love happy.  And if I screw it up, and have to delay making them happy, they get it.  Most of the people I love enough to produce handknits for are craftsmen and craftswomen themselves, and they know what it means to have those unforeseen difficulties, equipment failures and life farts that stall projects from time to time.

I don’t mean to get all soppy on you, but that’s the kind of shit that makes me remember why I knit.  Nothing to worry about, plenty to win.

PS — I am currently working on a new and exciting project, but in secret.  I’ll blog about it properly when it’s done.

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